Brutal Pearls And Subtle Bright Red Lipstick; The Power Of An Oxymoron

"Cool" fashion usually involves tension of one sort or another. The wearer has enough force of character, or enough vision, to carry off a union of unmatching goods. Combining patterns, textures, or "high-low" elements.

While cool isn't a dominant High WASP trait, some style archetypes are cooler than others. The Grande Dame wears a messy bun with her red satin ballgown. The Artsy Cousin mixes ikat, madras, and pearls. The Sturdy Cousin, well, if she's cool it's usually inadvertent. She buys a mariniere t-shirt while biking through Normandy, and upon her return to the US she finds it's an overnight fashion sensation.

But, as a Sturdy Gal myself, I am drawn like a taupe moth to the blood-red flame. And would like to offer up two possibilities for high tension fashion. For the oxymoronic among us.

First, "brutal pearls." Duchesse at Passage des Pearls put together a list of presents for 20-year olds. Among the suggestions, a pearl necklace strung visibly on linen. Brutal, if you will.

Brutal Pearls by High WASP on Polyvore.com

Pearls on leather or rubber. Diamond ornamentation, even. Style oxymorons. Or, similarly, a gold plaque on wrapped, rough leather from a wonderful jewelry store with endless online goods, Ylang23. One might engrave on it, as a reminder, what Lydia, or @littlefluffycat's dad used to say. "All you can do is all you can do, but all you can do is enough." Therapeutic for the Sturdy Gal. Or one might mix modes even further, and engrave one's monogram, ornate and classic. I know, right?

Second, I would like to suggest a subtle, but bright, red lipstick. This is a recent purchase. Jane at simple + pretty recommended Lipstick Queen. For some unknown reason, as I have said, I have a faith in makeup that I have long since discarded vis-a-vis clothing. My faith is not misplaced here.


Lipstick Queen "Medieval" red lipstick.

I am another proponent of lipstick that looks like your lips but better. In the Nars "Cruising" I found a nude. In the Lipstick Queen "Medieval," what we have is a glamorous, sultry, lip-bitten, subtle, easy red. That is completely and totally wearable when you run to the grocery store in your son's khaki pants, a white tee, and turquoise Haviana flip flops. I know. I've done that difficult experiment for you. And, in case you wondered, even cool people with red lipstick sometimes then leave all the produce they just purchased in the store. No matter. A lipstick with all the allure of red, one that even Sturdy Gals can wear to leave the house, makes up for so many missteps.

Note: To anyone new to Privilege, the Grande Dame, Artsy Cousin, and Sturdy Gal are High WASP style archetypes. If you search the blog, using that handy search box on the upper left hand side, for any one of them, the general tomfoolery will become clearer. I think.

No recompense was received for this post.

All The Days Of Your Pearls

Did any of you watch soap operas? In the days before reality TV, YouTube, and Twitter/Facebook, they were the only way to indulge in daily, trivial, calming time spent on other people's supposed problems. Remember the guy intoning, "All The Days Of Your Lives..."?

Those are my pearls. Up above. Really more than necessary. I'd say I didn't know how I got what seems to be so many, but I do. I know.

Like this.


In the last century, High WASPs had so much money they had jewelry made for their babies. Yes. They did. That bar pin? For a baby. I wear it on lapels now. Plunder from my mother's jewelry box, something I engaged in as a teenager as often as possible. I don't know why she let me. Oh the diamond stick pins I have lost. One in Buffalo, New York, of all places.

When I turned 21, I asked my father for a pearl necklace. Instead, he gave me pearl studs. I cried. There were mitigating circumstances. My parents had just divorced and many things otherwise tolerable made me cry. Being the sort of father who really didn't mean to make me sad, he then took me to visit the pearl dealer a friend of mine had recommended. And bought a strand of matched 7mm Mikimotos. Which you will see below, because I had them made into something else. What? Pearls are flexible like that.

Finally, a friend of mine got married a year or so after we graduated college. The little freshwater bracelet was a bridesmaid's present. The groom wore a kilt. Our bridesmaid dresses were yellow gauze with green edging on lettuce ruffles. They are no longer married. She is quite happy with husband number two.


Above we see the pearls of middle adulthood. The earrings from a modern day gypsy, for my wedding. Mabe pearls from my sister, given her by a friend, daughter of an alcohol fortune. The friend died, in a scuba accident. These things sound flippant, made up, but they weren't. Even the random parts of life eventually mean something.

I wore the earrings to sell nitrogen to semiconductor companies in the 1980's. Do we think large button earrings will return, in the wake of leggings? They did confer a certain authority, even on those of us scared to death by our negotiation responsibilities.

The pendant from my stepsister. She had kindly asked me to be the maid of honor at her wedding. Not one of my finest hours, in retrospect. Sometimes people don't want highly intellectual toasts at their rehearsal dinners. In which laughter on the eve of marriage is somehow celebrated by references to death. I think I meant well.

I bought a bracelet in India but the pearls disintegrated. I'm thinking they weren't pearls. The purchase was fun, however, and the tea I drank while sitting on pillows in the afternoon sun, delicious.


And finally, the pearls of our 50's. It's possible to gain confidence with age. Pearl audacity may follow. Purple gray earrings in 22k, with diamonds, a present from my mother. Daniel Gibbings, Santa Barbara. An 8.5mm necklace, 8.5-9mm earrings with small diamond accents, the original necklace from my father now a 3-strand bracelet. And yes, I will wear all the white ones together for the right occasion. With impunity. Because I play the Grande Dame as often as I can carry it off. For work, however, just the necklace, with diamond studs. Took me into the New York Stock Exchange and back out alive in September 2008. As the stock market fell around us. A cameraman tried to interview me as I walked down Wall Street. I told him I had nothing to say. Seriously.

I suppose it's time to do with the pearls what we do with everything in our 50's, throw away or transform. I'm leaning towards transformation. Thinking about having something made, an over-the-top pair of earrings, or a brooch. Maybe with the random little bitty diamonds that have also accumulated. Less room for clutter at this stage, even when it's opalescent. Even though it turns out to be awfully fun to rummage around in pearls with one's fingers.

*And if the gray earrings in the last photo appear to be Photoshopped in, that's because they are. Not due to non-existence, but because I am a forgetter-head and forgot to include them and by that point had reached the end of my patience for fidgeting with multiple pearls in a light box. Not sure whether to celebrate my new technical skills or mourn my lost capability to remember.

Can You Wear A Simple Pearl Strand With Simple Pearl Studs?

Joyce Hor-Chung Lau, a reader of this blog and, more importantly, a writer for the International Herald Tribune and The New York Times, asked me this question in a comment. (Wait. Small aside. Is that cool or what? She writes about Hong Kong and China. OK. Onwards.)

Question: Would you wear simple pearl earrings with a simple pearl necklace?

Well, no, I wouldn't. Does that mean that no one can do so? No. Does it even mean that no High WASP would do so? No. It means that High WASPs from California (we like a little counter-culture) by way of New York (we like a little flash) and New England (we like a little quirky), wouldn't wear little pearl studs and a 16-inch 7.0mm pearl necklace. Not together.

I have good data, however, indicating that winds blow differently down South. First, way back when, I mentioned, "wearing pearls irresponsibly." I meant the pearl stud with pearl strand combination. Mint Juleps and Magnolias took me to task. Wore her pearls irresponsibly with impunity. Quailing not one whit in the face of my pronouncement. Hmm.

Data point number two. One of my son's best friends was recruited to play tennis at a highly-regarded Southern university. She left California with wavy blonde hair, t-shirt and shorts. She returned with straight, even blonder hair, and dresses. Also pearls. She may even wear them to play tennis. I don't know. So let's assume that what I am about to say may possibly NOT apply south of the Mason-Dixon line. (Wait. Where IS the Mason-Dixon line? Hold on. Oh, OK. Onwards.)

Here's what my sub-species of High WASPs thinks about pearls. If you wear a simple strand, punk up the earrings. Or flash, or bling. Something. If you wear simple studs, elevate the necklace. Or do without, and wear a pin instead. Pearl pins are one of the great cross-cultural inventions of all times. Artsy Cousins, Sturdy Gals, Grandes Dames, we can all find a pearl pin that speaks our language.

Earrings to Wear with a Simple Strand


From Mary Jo Matsumoto. These are among my all-time favorites. I don't own them. Yet. But I love the contrast of shiny smooth pearl and rougher fittings. To say nothing of whimsical sea creatures. Sturdy Gals are addicted to whimsy. We are guilty of almost every single present of Santa underwear you will ever receive. Onward.

(Much as I love the chocolate pearls at top, I wouldn't mix them with a white strand. Looks too accidental. But these earrings in white, with the starfish fittings, and a simple white strand. Yes. Would do it.)

Another option? Go vintage. They knew from pearl earrings in the Mad Men era.


Wouldn't those clusters look nice with, say, these?


Necklaces to Wear with Pearl Studs



Add chain links to pearls for a little motorcycle debutante chic. Or, for the Grande Dames who would not be seen dead on, or even near, a motorcycle, add a clasp. Simple.

Or one you notice.


Finally, pearl pins.
Tell me that's not cute. Go on. Try.

And before you buy any pearls at all, read this post.

Images:
Mary Jo Matsumoto 12MM Chocolate South Sea Starfish $2,400
Mary Jo Matsumoto 15MM White South Sea Shells $4,000
Beladora 2 Cluster Earrings $395
Blue Nile 16-inch 6.5-7mm Akoya $860
Beladora Pearls With Links $470.25
The Pearl Outlet Square $110
House of Clasps Toggle $1280
Beladora 2 Pearl Pin $295